I have encountered difficult time like other people.
During my stay in home, I have tried to maintain my positive attitude and feeling. I have told myself everything will be well soon.
It is easy to say, but it is not easy to do.
Early days that I came to stay in house, closed the gate, no contact even with my neighbor or friend, I thought it was fine; I could do it. But after several days had passed, I realized it was really hard.
At nights, I did not sleep. If the clock did not strike 4am or 5am, some days 7am, my eyes were unable to shut.
I thought reason I did not sleep was because I used phone till late night, so, I tried to go to bed at 10pm, and I did not use electric devices three hours before I climbed the bed. Still, I could not shut my eyes until the sky had light.
I felt not well.
My eyes were hurt. My stomach was ached - I usually got diarrhea. Even in my heart had small pains - sometimes.
Moreover, my feeling was affected badly.
I became short-tempered. I quarreled with my family members. I liked to stay alone, and visioned silly images - for example, I saw my family member fell into a deep well, then I screamed and wanted to jump to help them.
I was scared when I awoke and reminded about it.
I was really frightened, I was confused, I did not know what was happened with myself.
I called my friends and told them about my condition. They said they had similar condition; they told it was because of stress.
After I heard, I thought that they were right.
I was stressed. I was under pressure because I did not have income. I could not go out to work. I had daily spending, food, electricity, phone top up etc.
Everyday, from morning till night, I did not see anything besides the wall, and confronted with screen. These made me do not sleep - and what I mentioned above was not-sleep-impact.
I talked to my family; they advised me to not think too much and to find way to release my pressure. I followed their telling. I tried to make myself sleep.
I listened to music. I did meditation. I worked out. I practiced yoga. I applied pressure on hands. Still, my eyes did not shut.
I felt my life was horrible without night sleep.
One day, my family bought sweetsops. I ate its flesh and spit out its seeds. Suddenly, when I looked at the seeds, an idea popped up - I want to plant this sweetsop. Then I started planting.
My family does not like to have plant around house because they think it attracts mosquito and other dangerous insects. However, they allow me to do because they want me to be happy.
My house does not have land yard; I planted the seeded in plastic bottle of pure drinking waters and put them in balcony. I did not expect it to grow, but it grew. When I found the first green leaves, I was so glad. I felt my mind was at ease. And at that moment, I found way to solve my sleeping problem.
Since then, I plant many such as edible amaranth, sweetsop, lemongrass, even grass.
I am busy in my gardening - water it, chase pest etc.
Magically, sleeping comes back. I don't need to force myself to shut eyes anymore. No longer than 12am, my eyes drop.
Not only sleeping but also wake up hour and mind.
I get up early and regularly.
I don't see any scary image anymore. My feeling is fresh. In addition, I smile all the times when I see green colors from the plants in my balcony. That kind of color produces peaceful delight in my life.
It is so amazing.
Hence, I have continue doing gardening in the balcony. Even though it is small, but it is precious to me. I am thinking of planting more vegetables and trees. After they are growing, I will share my plants to people. I want to spread green trees to all around the world.
Our earth does really need green. Animal needs it. We, human, need it as well. Tree has many advantages; specially, it cures our mental. The natural green color releases our mental from unpleasant imaginary. It frees our mind and feeling from sadness, pressure, and other heavy mind conditions.
I hope my article will be beneficial for people around the world that are under pressure and facing life strain. I hope everyone will be released and able to smile.
Join together build the tree.
For a better world.
Off mental health.